May 2022: Preparing for my first car boot sale at Forest Farm, Barkingside
Feeling lost, I went into the forest and implored out loud, “Where do I go next in life?”…
Jan came home one day and mentioned that Forest Farm, Barkingside car boot was starting up again this month. Since 2019 I’ve had a burning desire to run some type of market stall selling my art, bric-a-brac, plants, cake and books and doing car boot sales feels ‘right’ in my gut and a great opportunity to hopefully start earning money again and engaging in person with others in a Covid-safe way. This poem spoke to me and made me doubly determined to make a go of it: 'The Flea' by Gail Mazur It’ll also be a step in the right direction towards living tiny in that it shall help me downsize my possessions.
The Poetry Project published some sound poems I wrote in response to the workshop, “Just Speak Nearby” with Kimberly Alidio in their online publication, Footnotes, which as ever I was thrilled about: 'Three Poems, a Film and an Improvisation' by Gemma Boyd
I felt myself melting and things flowing again, and as usual I had to keep reminding myself that I deserve any good that comes my way.
A very welcome free gift arrived in my inbox: the Hormones, Health and Harmony docuseries with Dr. Trevor Cates: My monthly cycle has been problematic all my life; affecting my mood, energy levels, work, relationships… you name it, so to have some up-to-date expert advice from doctors who don’t just throw ‘the pill’ and antidepressants at women to mask hormone problems has given me fresh hope as I navigate the upcoming menopause.
I happened upon the psychiatrist, Jungian analyst and author, Jean Shinoda Bolan being interviewed by founder of Sounds True; Tami Simon: ‘Becoming Who You Are Meant To Be' by Sounds True. Jean sort of gave me permission not to feel guilty that I have more affinity for nurturing plants than I do for climbing mainstream ladders of wealth and power. After hearing this my love for working in my garden and on my allotments deepened and I really took my time with potting on the wide variety of seedlings I’ve germinated this year and discovered that the ‘organic way’ of sprinkling oats around vulnerable sprouting crops such as chamomile, doesn’t ultimately deter slugs and snails because once it’s rained the oats harden and the molluscs are provided with direct access to their delicious green prizes once more. Instead, I put my leftover curries and soups out which gangs of slugs and snails love. This keeps them off my plants (at least for a bit)! I also learnt that an overgrown-looking allotment can be brought back under control in a short time (with patience and self-compassion). I felt the angelic presence of my violinist friend, Peter, who died in Paris 10 years ago this month, and sowed rainbow carrots directly into the soil for him in remembrance, plus I started intercropping for the first time; growing groups of plants together, for example, tomatoes, nasturtiums and bush beans, that support and protect each other.
“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and freedom.”